We try to stay connected as a family...each to one another and to God (individually and as a family).

This helps us to reach IN to our family

and UP to God

while reaching OUT to others.

Families that work well together really have to know one another.  Each person of the family is "linked" in some way to each of the others.  They do things together as a family which help them function as individuals as well as work together as a team.  These families work toward a common goal.  It helps if these families start out  before children are added in, or when the kids are very young.  Still you can start working "together" at any time.  You just have to be patient.

You might ask yourself what you can do together.  Maybe you all have such different intersts that it seems you will never be able to reach out to your kids or talk to your parents.  Still, if you think hard, you will be able to find common ground.

Here are some of the things we do or have done in the past:

REACH IN TO THE FAMILY (talk, eat and play)

1) Make meals together. Eat meals together.  We do this all the time, at least once a day.  Sometimes this isn't possible, but try to do this at least once or twice each week.  You can even go out, or maybe order pizza!

2) Have a family game or movie night. Trail rides are also good.

3) Have dad make a "date" with each one of the kids individually.  It's hard for dads to stay connected with their kids, and this is one way to do it.  Plus, it is extremely important for young girls to have the experience of being taken out on a "date" by a man they can trust;  they need to learn what to expect when they are older, and not to settle for less!  We started  "date nights" when the kids were seven...Dad took the boys out to play golf or ball, and took our daughter to dinner and a movie (it was always the kids' choice of activities).

REACH UP TO GOD

4) Go to church together. Sit together in church, and talk about the sermon topic on the ride or walk home. Set up a kids' or teens' Bibly study in your home, led by you and some other parents.

5) Pray before meals.  Have the kids pray sometimes, too.

6) Read the Bible together before bedtime.

7) Pray together before bedtime.  I have taught my kids some general guidelines for prayers...We really like ACTS from Vicki Courtney's book, "Your Girl,"  which, incidentally, is a great resource for those parents with daughters. (www.vickicourtney.com)

ACTS  is to say:

Adoration and Praise

Confession

Thanksgiving

Supplication (that's where you get to ask for things like help, wisdom, and generally whatever is on your mind)

  *When the kids were young, we did the "Five Finger Prayer"  (www.crmin.org/prayerguide/five_finger.htm)

REACH OUT WITH GOD'S LOVE

8) Find a service project that you can do as a family.  Your church might provide some opportunities, but there are many ways to work together.  I know of families who work one evening a month giving out food to the less fortunate in a local soup kitchen.  Our kids organized a stuffed animal drive for foster care kids one year.  We also sang and played for the church services at a local nursing home (we have a musical family).  When I was young, my Mother organized weekly craft classes that we taught at the local home and school for the blind.  That experience has stayed with me all my life, by the way.  It has played a major role in shaping the person I am today, some thirty years later!  Service projects teach love, nurturing, giving without necessarily receiving,appreciation and obedience.  These experiences are invaluable when your child becomes an adult, and they are invaluable to you as the parent while your kids are still young!